Friday, February 24, 2012

Another year older.....and wiser.

     Every day, American women and girls are besieged by images and messages that suggest their beauty is inadequate—inflicting immeasurable harm upon their confidence and sense of wellbeing. In "Beautiful You", author Rosie Molinary—in no uncertain terms—encourages women, whatever their size, shape, and color, to work toward feeling wonderful about themselves despite today’s media-saturated culture. Drawing on self-awareness, creativity, and mind-body connections, "Beautiful You" incorporates practical techniques into a 365-day action plan that empowers women to regain a healthy self-image, shore up self-confidence, reframe and break undermining habits of self-criticism, and champion their own emotional and physical wellbeing. Through accessible, doable daily actions, women and girls are encouraged to manifest a healthy outlook on life—teaching them to live large, and starting them on the path to learning to love themselves and others. Molinary steers clear of the florid affirmations and daily meditations often utilized by books geared toward personal growth, and instead delivers a hip, modern guide of inspirational thought that keeps pace with the times. "Beautiful You" is a practical, candid, and accessible handbook that will strike a chord with every woman who has ever faltered in her self-confidence or lost her personal brilliance—and it will make sure she never lets it happen again.

     I saw this book on Pinterest and thought I'd share as it's definitely going on MY must-read list;  as stated above, so many of us women struggle with self-esteem issues at some point in our lives.

     I have low self-esteem and my husband, bless his heart, really dislikes it whenever he hears me speaking negatively about myself.  One of the things I love most about him is how he builds me up and makes me feel I can do anything I set my mind to.  I have shared with him how I grew up without hearing ANY positive affirmations of my self worth, and how at age 54 that continues to affect me. 

     As time ticks on and those voices in my head are still there decades later, I'm starting to understand how nobody else's words can ever replace those unspoken by the ones who gave you life.  Intellectually I KNOW I am a beautiful soul and that I deserve love but if my own mother (my biological father wasn't in my life) couldn't verbalize OR show me love then that ultimately "speaks" volumes. Despite counseling and reading enough self-improvement books to understand that my poor role models don't reflect MY worth,  it seems that nagging question will forevermore remain:  if I'm so wonderful, why doesn't my own mother love me?

     Most days I don't dwell on my past; there has been far too much hurt to go into here but I am happy now and have chosen to focus on my blessings and the positive aspects of my life. My mothers birthday is days away and I've been reflecting on the past year and the fact that I haven't heard from her in almost 365 days.  She phoned me LAST January, on my birthday, and claimed she was "going to do better this year" at communicating with me.  Throughout all the ups and mostly downs of our relationship, we've never stopped talking for this length of time.  Now, for the first time, I really don't have anything to say.  More importantly, there is NOTHING she could possibly say to me to explain why she's ignored me for an entire year.  I got engaged, married and moved in those 365 days but she didn't acknowledge those life events.

      I've done a lot of soul-searching lately and I'm grateful that I'm here to celebrate my own milestones and achievements because of the woman who's turning 71 next week.  This is a turning point for me to look at what's been such a bitter journey in a new light and I trust that the book "Beautiful You" will present even more opportunities for me to continue on this path. 




  1. Beauty comes in different packages and sometimes even in the strangest ones, Shelly.

    I hope you have the time to visit my post, "Call Me Beautiful."


  2. You're lucky to have that wonderful hubby! Sorry your mom has not been there for you, I guess it makes me appreciate my mom all the more, as I do take her for granted.

    1. Thanks for commenting, Christine. I always tell people who have decent, loving parents to NEVER take that for granted as not everyone has that experience. I do agree; my hubby was brought into my life in God's time and he's been a tremendous role in my new outlook and personal growth!

  3. Hi Shelly, I feel your pain and path to wholeness. I've read many self-help books myself and nothing has made me feel whole. My path to wholeness is focusing not on me but on Jesus. The more I get to know Him and what He says about me, the less it matters what others say and do. Don't get me wrong I have those days when those negative words sting but I try to not give them power in my life. Jesus is quite fond of me and that's all that matters.
    He's quite fond of you too! Blessings dear friend.
    Kimberly <3

    1. Kimberly, thank you for those kind words! As I say in my post, I've come a long way to be able to finally put a different spin on this and I'm really proud of the self-growth I've accomplished so far. ~Blowing blessings back at ya!